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What if My Effort is a Cutting-Edge App, but My Mind is Still “Windows 95”?

1. A Chance Encounter with a Book

This story doesn’t begin with some grand realization.
In fact, I still find myself asking the same question over and over:

Why is it that despite all my efforts, my life doesn’t seem to change much?

There are times when I feel like I’m living diligently, yet always stuck in the negatives—
a kind of exhaustion, like running endlessly on a hamster wheel.
Perhaps I’ve been looking for the cause in the wrong place.

A while ago, while browsing a thrift store, a book caught my eye.
It was The Secret.

It was a book that once spread like a cultural phenomenon,
but somehow I had never gotten around to reading it.
I bought it without much expectation and slowly began turning the pages.

Yet instead of the book’s content itself,
one question lingered in my mind:

If my life were a business enterprise,
have I been running it in an outdated, overly narrow way?

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2. I’m Putting in the Effort—So Why Do the Results Feel the Same?

I consider myself a fairly diligent person.
I try not to procrastinate, and when problems arise,
I make an effort to understand their causes.

Still, strangely, the results of my efforts seem to stay in the same place.

Then a metaphor came to me.

No matter how powerful a program is,
an outdated operating system will cause constant errors.

Maybe I’ve been trying to run a new life
on top of an old mental operating system.

It’s as if I’ve been busy installing the latest apps—
new habits, learning, financial planning—
while the OS underneath is still running on Windows 95.

Vintage Windows 95 desktop interface as a metaphor for an outdated mental operating system.

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3. The Default Setting Called “Scarcity”

While reading the book, the word that stayed with me most
wasn’t manifestation or quantum mechanics,
terms that are often mentioned these days.

It was scarcity.

I’ve long thought this way:

• I don’t have enough money, so I need to earn more.

• I don’t have peace of mind, so I need to succeed.

• The current version of me is still not enough.

This way of thinking isn’t necessarily wrong.
The problem is that it quietly became the default setting of my mind.

When you always start from a place of lack,
your actions become rushed and your choices anxious.
Before long, you find yourself trapped in a familiar loop—
where the outcome leads right back to insufficiency.

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4. Checking the Life Operating System

These days, instead of thinking,
“I need to change my life,”
I find myself thinking,
“Maybe I should check the operating system first.”

I don’t have a perfect method,
and I’m certainly not someone who has it all figured out.
But here are a few things I’ve been experimenting with:

Monitoring Thoughts
I notice the thoughts that repeat throughout the day.
Am I seeing things from a place of not having,
or from a sense of already having enough?

Pre-Tasting the Feeling
For a few moments before falling asleep,
I imagine the emotional state of a version of me who is already doing okay.
Not the outcome—just the feeling.

Immediate Action
When a small inspiration appears,
I try to move first before calculating the results.

I still waver often,
and I’m not always sure whether I’m doing this “right.”
But compared to before,
I’ve become much more aware of how my mind reacts.

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5. An Update Still in Progress

This isn’t a post offering answers.
It’s closer to a note I’m writing to myself.

Maybe life isn’t about fixing or rewriting what’s broken,
but about continuously updating what already exists.

Fixing tries to repair.
Rewriting tries to erase.
Updating simply allows growth.

There are still plenty of bugs.
Sometimes I revert to older versions.
But one thing is clear:

Instead of blindly pushing myself harder,
I’ve started questioning the system I’m operating from.

What version of your life’s operating system are you running right now?
Is it possible you’re holding onto an old OS—without even realizing it?